And that's it...We're out of ingredients

Whoever knows the reference in my title is a champ.

That is all folks. Tonight I pack and leave for Narita in the morning. I had the most amazing time I could possibly imagine. My thoughts right now are split 50/50 with "I can't wait to go home (and even back to school)" and "I want to come back as soon as I can."

I have known I was meant for city life for a long time. I have New Haven, but everyone knows that doesn't count as a city. I think it's genetic. My Dad is from New York, and four of my cousins (all raised one town over from me) live/go to school in New York. As for me, I have probably spent only a couple weeks worth of total time in New York City during my life. After these two months, I feel attached to this city. It is the first city I have lived in, so now it feels like "my city."

As I am writing this, I can't help but laugh at my last statement. How can I make such a claim when I was never a part of this city? I merely adapted, rather than integrated. The collection of my actions here, though varied and vast, do not amount to more than that of a tourist. A tourist takes experiences and confines to the frame of their life, but the experiences themselves are not their life. On top of this I have made no lasting friends in Tokyo.

I do feel like I have discovered a lot. I am in that halfway state of knowing a lot of the city, but still having much to explore. Also, I saw more of Japan than just Tokyo. I meet several Tokyo natives who marveled at the fact that I had seen more of Japan than they had.

I am returning to the States with several things. Among these, obviously, are my new T shirts, my Jisho (dictionary), ticket stubs, fliers, my Japanese cellphone (keitai), my suica card, and the 10 CDs I bought today (bringing my total to 12). However, I also have a renewed devotion to the study of the Japanese language. My time here has improved my comprehension considerably, but I still cannot hold a casual conversation (I am limited to basic questions and answers). My course schedule will continue to have Japanese in it for as long as I can keep it that way.

I have no idea what I want to do with my life. These two months around music make me feel like I should give it a shot after college (I wasn't planning on going to grad school immediately after anyway). There's something romantic about the lifestyle, but I also want a family. I just don't see the two working out together and I know which one I give priority. However, now I do know that Tokyo will be making a bigger appearance somewhere in my life. I am coming back here. Next time I will actually integrate. I may want to live here, at least for some of my life.

Until then, this blog is pretty irrelevant. For now, this is the final post.